Love Marriage Vs Arranged Marriage: Group Discussion (GD) Topic

Marriages have a significant value in people’s lives, whether love marriage or arranged marriage. It's not only about two people coming together for the rest of their lives but also about building society. Since Indian culture is so connected with traditions, they value the concept of arranged marriage. On the other hand, some people think love marriages are better than arranged marriages. Whatever decision a person makes will have an impact on society as well as the economy. Almost 10 million weddings are done in India every year out of them only 2% are love marriages. In India, the marriage market is quite big. Let me know which one is better in a love marriage vs an arranged marriage discussion.

Facts of Love Marriage vs Arranged Marriage

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Advantages of Love Marriage

1. Partners know each other very well and they know what is good or bad of their partners.
2. Both the people mutually decided on marriage after knowing each other so they can not blame anyone.
3. Love marriage eliminated the major social problem of dowry as couples with mutual consent denied this.
4. Love marriage enables two people from different cultures, and states to come together which is not possible in an arranged marriage.
5. Mainly love is the basis of marriage and it eliminates the question of whether they will fall in love with each other after marriage or not.

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Disadvantages of Love Marriage

1. Compatibility is the major issue in love marriage as the ego of the partner comes in between. The reason for this is they think the other person should understand them as they have been together for quite a long time.
2. Many people confuse attraction with love. After the attraction fades away the problem in the relationship starts.
3. In India, love marriages are unacceptable and in some cases, we have seen family members killing the couple or not accepting them as part of the family.
4. In some cases, people in love neglect the bad things about a person which becomes a bigger issue later like murder, domestic violence, and more.
5. Sometimes people get bored after dating each other for a long time and things start getting complicated between them.

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Advantages of Arranged Marriages

1. Arranged marriage is not limited to two individuals; it is a connection between two families. Indians are fond of their love and tradition. It's quite beautiful to see a family live together.
2. Couples sometimes misjudge each other and behave immaturely. At that time people around them helped them to resolve their problems.
3. In arranged marriage people do not know much about each other and there is an excitement to knowing each other. In this process, the bond becomes stronger.
4. Arranged marriage is accepted by all the cultures in India and they see couples with respect.
5. Since families are involved here they tried to know every possible information about the couple. As a family background, a person's behaviour tells a lot about the person.

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Disadvantages of Arranged Marriages

1. One of the major drawbacks of arranged marriages is dowry. It's quite common and there are thousands of examples where things have gone worse if dowry was not offered.
2. In this people are not known to each other and hence it is possible that they do not feel comfortable. Also, there is a chance they won't be able to develop a feeling of love.
3. Also in arranged marriages, it is impossible for two people from different cultural, religious, or caste backgrounds to marry each other.
4. In the name of arranged marriage, forced marriages are also done in many places. In rural areas, the groom and bride see each other for the first time.

Instead of thinking about love marriages vs arranged marriages, which option is better?

The right question should be: ‘’What actually makes a marriage successful?’’

So, the biggest misconception that many people have about love marriage is that it means more love and arranged marriages means better understanding and mutual consent. Marriage is a long-term commitment between two people. A successful marriage depends on the fact that how two people treat each other after the wedding.

Some of the major factors that can help a marriage to be successful are:

1. Communication:

Communication is the key to success in every relationship, couples should be capable and comfortable enough to communicate with each other without any hesitation. They should discuss everything about their personal as well as professional life, from small decisions to big life decisions. Communication makes it easier for the person to understand one another. So in any kind of a marriage whether it’s love or arranged , communication plays an important role.

2. Mutual Respect:

Love without respect can become quite unhealthy and toxic in any kind of relationship. Respect should be the foundation of every relationship. Couples should respect each other’s opinions, career, decisions, families, and individuality as a person. There should be mutual respect and understanding between each other which will make the relationship more stronger and faithful. So whether it’s love or arranged marriage every relationship demands respect between one another.

3. Financial Compatibility:

The financial aspect is another important factor in every relationship. Money can become a major reason for conflicts, stress, disagreements and breakup in the relationship. Financial compatibility does not simply mean that both parties should earn the same amount of money, it simply means that both people share similar values about money. Couples should discuss and communicate about their spending habits, income, investments, loan and their financial responsibilities with each other.

4. Life goals:

Some of the questions should be discussed before the wedding only to avoid conflicts and disagreements. Couples should be well aware about each other’s life goals and desires. In love marriage there is a possibility that the life goals are discussed openly before marriage but in arranged marriages there are less chances to understand each other in a manner where everything about your life goal is discussed. But in order to make your marriage successful it is important to discuss some questions before the wedding about career goals and ambitions, so that there can be a clear understanding.

5. Emotional intelligence:

Emotional intelligence and maturity is required in every relationship especially in a marriage where two people are living together under the same roof. In every relationship, disagreements and conflicts happen but what makes a relationship stronger is the ability to understand, communicate, resolve conflicts and support each other through thick and thin. So whether it's love or arranged, in every marriage it is better to have clear communication, healthier conflict resolution, deeper empathy and control over your emotions.

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Some of the questions to be asked before the wedding:

Whether it’s a love or arranged marriage, couples should have a meaningful and honest conversations about:

→Career ambitions

→Financial planning and responsibility

→Children and parenting

→Habits and lifestyle

→long-term goals

→Religious and cultural believes

→Each other’s families

→Household responsibilities

→Expectations from the marriage life

→Personal preferences

Conclusion

So we can say that both love and arranged marriages have their pros and cons. Eventually, it depends on the people who are marrying each other and the society how they are accepting it. Love marriages don't promote the wrong culture, on the other hand, arranged marriages don't give surety of a happy life. It is people who need to make their decisions wisely without under any other person's influence. It will make their married life work smoothly whether it is an arranged marriage or a love marriage.

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